It is time now!!

that's not true Kenny!
My sister has been trhu a lot and aknowledges that you have too!
I think your post was great and I think it takes one heck of a person to say what you said!
Don't forget the LOL at the end.

Bill,
You and your wife have done all you can until your son decides for himself.
You can not allow that to "take you both down" because hopefully he will get the help he needs, and when he does..he will need you then. Be Strong!
I admire you
 

Kenny

Guest
Nah, I don't seethe anymore, I just kinda do a slow boil.
It's not about you!! You said "you bleeding heart liberal."
and I added what the troll said about me, "seething with hatred"..A joke, of course I'm not.. Pissed, now don't get me started..LOL
Thank you by the way, no biggie. Anything else, just ask.
 
Last edited:

Mentiras y Traición

Sonoran Goddess
It's not about you!! You said "you bleeding heart liberal."
and I added what the troll said about me, "seething with hatred"..A joke, of course I'm not.. Pissed, now don't get me started..LOL
Thank you by the way, no biggie. Anything else, just ask.
Don't worry, I can't even figure out how to spell seeth, seethe, or whatever the heck it is.
 

Roberto

Guest
Thanks all We have been doing this for over 10 years no. In and out of rehabs, long periods of sober and back again. At one of his long term sobers he was even talking to youth groups for AAA. Don't think bad of us but we have given up.
Bill,
Sometimes not giving up means the appearance of giving up. Letting them go to jail when there is a problem is sometimes the best thing. If they steal from you , have them arrested. Don't bail them out if they land in jail. They get dried out and get some motivation. Sounds bad , but that's tough love and it works.
 
Hey Bill, I'm so sorry for opening that can of worms. I did not mean to imply that your life is a walk in the park. I know--I'm in the same boat somewhat. My 26 year old son started doing meth in high school and I was so blind.....had no idea that it was going on. He's off it now but he LOVES his alcohol. We've been through it all--kicking him out, having him arrested, the whole nine yards. He's unemployed more than he is employed. When we would kick him out, "a mother's love for her child" would overwhelm me and I would let him come back. For soooo many years, I beat my head against the wall many times trying to figure out where I went wrong, what should I have done differently. Well, I finally came to my senses and told myself it was nothing I did. He was a teenager when he started, but he is an adult now and as such, must take responsibility for himself. He chooses to live his life this way and I can only hope that when we "evict" him (I drew up a rental agreement that states the term of the lease ends 12/31/09 and he has until 01/04/10 to be out), he DOES hit total rock bottom--it will be the only thing that can hopefully straighten him out. I am giving up once and for all--I've done everything I can--it's up to him. The funny thing about talking about this is that you think no one else is going through the same thing as you and talking about is somewhat embarrassing--I've many times felt people might judge me or look down on me because my son, for the most part, is a loser. But he choose's to be this way--I don't (or didn't) choose it for him. So, come 01/04/10, I will become woman (hear me ROAR) first and mother second. If the end result is not what I want or hope it to be, well then I guess it's just meant to be the way it is. A mother's love (and father's-don't get me wrong) is something so overpowering, but we mustn't let it rule our lives anymore. We just need to keep hoping and praying that they will finally figure it out. So, Bill, again I'm sorry to have stirred up what I know is a very emotional and trying time for you and your wife. I will be thinking of you both and wish you the best of luck. HANG IN THERE--YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!!!!!!!
 
Playa, I'm also in Tucson--can you give me more info on SAMAC. And Bill, everyone is right--you and Edna need to live your lives the way you want and if tough love is what it takes, then so be it.
 

Mentiras y Traición

Sonoran Goddess
Hey Bill, I'm so sorry for opening that can of worms. I did not mean to imply that your life is a walk in the park. I know--I'm in the same boat somewhat. My 26 year old son started doing meth in high school and I was so blind.....had no idea that it was going on. He's off it now but he LOVES his alcohol. We've been through it all--kicking him out, having him arrested, the whole nine yards. He's unemployed more than he is employed. When we would kick him out, "a mother's love for her child" would overwhelm me and I would let him come back. For soooo many years, I beat my head against the wall many times trying to figure out where I went wrong, what should I have done differently. Well, I finally came to my senses and told myself it was nothing I did. He was a teenager when he started, but he is an adult now and as such, must take responsibility for himself. He chooses to live his life this way and I can only hope that when we "evict" him (I drew up a rental agreement that states the term of the lease ends 12/31/09 and he has until 01/04/10 to be out), he DOES hit total rock bottom--it will be the only thing that can hopefully straighten him out. I am giving up once and for all--I've done everything I can--it's up to him. The funny thing about talking about this is that you think no one else is going through the same thing as you and talking about is somewhat embarrassing--I've many times felt people might judge me or look down on me because my son, for the most part, is a loser. But he choose's to be this way--I don't (or didn't) choose it for him. So, come 01/04/10, I will become woman (hear me ROAR) first and mother second. If the end result is not what I want or hope it to be, well then I guess it's just meant to be the way it is. A mother's love (and father's-don't get me wrong) is something so overpowering, but we mustn't let it rule our lives anymore. We just need to keep hoping and praying that they will finally figure it out. So, Bill, again I'm sorry to have stirred up what I know is a very emotional and trying time for you and your wife. I will be thinking of you both and wish you the best of luck. HANG IN THERE--YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!!!!!!!
Change just a few details, and I'm right there with you. May the Grace of God be with you both - and all of us that face this.
 

playaperro

El Pirata
Playa, I'm also in Tucson--can you give me more info on SAMAC. And Bill, everyone is right--you and Edna need to live your lives the way you want and if tough love is what it takes, then so be it.
Beachgirl, SAMAC # in Tucson is 520 622 6000. They are for anyone seeking help! No charge.
 
Top