Lets try to be patient with HAPPY

Kenny

Well Known Member
Lets try to be patient with HAPPY. Like he said, he's "retired" now, and that can lead to emotional problems with some people... This is the last report I received from a friend about his behavior while shopping in a popular dept store in Tucson for the 6 months or so, and it looks like he's not doing so well in his golden years.


  1. Took 18 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's baskets when they weren't looking.
  2. Set all the alarm clocks in household department to go off at 5 minute intervals.
  3. Made a trail of tomato ketchup on the floor leading to the toilets.
  4. Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 5' in fruit and veg..... and then watched what happened.
  5. Moved a ' CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
  6. Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he' d invite them in for a cup of coffee if they would bring pillows from the bedding department.
  7. When a shelf stacker asks if they can help him, he begins to cry and demands, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
  8. Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose in a disgusting fashion.
  9. Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme tune.
  10. Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled ' Pick me! Pick me!'
  11. When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the foetal position and screams, 'NO! NO! It's those voices again!'
  12. And; last, but not least!
  13. Feb 24: Went into a fitting room in the clothing department, shut the door and waited awhile; then, yelled, very loudly, 'There is no toilet paper in here!'
 
Top